Jesus and the Divorce Attorney

This week my van died, so Beau and I have been sharing one vehicle and navigating schedules. It's been a new level of communication ;)  Yesterday as I was waiting to pick him up from a meeting, I was scrolling through videos on my phone.  I came across a little clip of an interview with a very prominent divorce attorney who is also a well known author. The interviewer asked the attorney "What do you suggest married couples do to keep their marriage healthy?"

After hearing his answer, I was shocked!

But first let me take you back.....

A couple of years ago, I was by myself in the sanctuary worshipping and praying when all of the sudden, I felt the Lord invite me to sit knee to knee with him. I sat down "crisscross, applause" and I closed my eyes and pictured Jesus sitting in front of me. I felt the Lord say "tell me three things you see and love about Me this week." I thought that was going to be easy! The hardest part was choosing to think about which three characteristics was I noticing that week. There are so many things to like and love about the Lord but what I am focusing on about Him changes all the time. So I told Him what came to mind and I felt His delight. Then.... and I didn't expect this part... Jesus started to tell me three things that He saw and loved about me. Oh my heart.....It was so personal and so timely. I felt so seen and loved by Him.  I felt like my heart may explode I was so amazed at how He spoke and saw me. I pretty much danced out of there that day.

It went so well that later that night I decided to try it with my hubby! After dinner, I had Beau sit down knee to knee with me and we took turns, one at a time, telling each other what we really appreciated or loved that week. Not stuff we did or tasks completed. Actual characteristics. It was so good that we have kept this practice going. Not every week but consistently we choose to stop and look each other in the eye and notice something specific about the other that really brings us appreciation. Words of life poured out... I have since done this with my kids and I'm just telling you if you come to this position, heart intended to pour out love and willing to fully receive love, love is indeed what you find.


So back to the interview:


The divorce attorney took a breath and said "I tell married couples that a practical step to staying out of my office is to take five to fifteen minutes a week telling their spouse what they like and love about them. And each week the things have to be different."

THIS WAS SO FUN FOR ME!!
I appreciated this gentleman's wisdom but I laughed that Jesus got to tell me first. He is the Alpha, after all :)

Here's the thing...relationships require intentionality and attention to grow and be healthy. Our relationship with Abba, Jesus, Holy Spirit and our relationship with people. Every human heart has the deep desire to be seen and known. It's easy to let schedules and the busyness of our lives take the first place. It can even seem illogical or uncomfortable to stop and say these things when you're going in different directions. But it is absolutely vital to relational flourishing.

If you are married, I am challenging, encouraging and even beseeching you to MAKE THE TIME to come close to your God-given gift of a spouse and notice them and tell them what you love and like about them this week. DO NOT JUST ASSUME THEY KNOW. I'm not yelling at you, I just love you all too much to be quiet. Hear my heart.

Husband, go first and be tender. Wives, genuinely receive his words.  Embrace each one another. Maybe even a big ole married kiss! Enjoy one another.

If you are currently single, Do this activity with Jesus! Take your journal along. Write down what He says. Find a place to be alone with just Him. Let Him minister to you as you minister to Him. May His wraparound presence hold you so tight!

I love you all so dearly.

May the Lord receive all the glory always,
Rachel